Primary Highlighted by Urbanowski Wins

KENTWOOD, MI (ScottyUrb News) - Scott Urbanowski and his mother won their races for Democratic Precinct Delegate on Tuesday, the Kent County Clerk said Thursday.

Scott Urbanowski, 34 votes, was re-elected to a third term, while his mother, Karen Ann Urbanowski, received three votes as a write-in candidate. James Chase, who has been a precinct delegate at least as long as the younger Urbanowski, won with 28 votes.

"I'm humbled, I'm gratified, I'm happy, I'm delighted, and I'm good-looking," said Scott Urbanowski.

Scott thanked all of his supporters as well as the three people who voted for his mom - Scott himself, Scott's mom herself, and Scott's dad.

"I'd especially like to thank my parents, as well as my bird, Sniffles, and our dogs, Lucy and Phoebe."

"Given that my dad and I helped Mom win, we both expect her to repay us for helping her win," Scott said.

"Otherwise, we'll run a smear campaign next time!"

Critics, however, said Urbanowski relied too much on rookies for their support.

"He got his mom to run!" complained Betsy DeVos. "I would never get a relative to run for anything!"

"Not to mention that their new dog, Phoebe Hussein Osama, has been living with them for just three weeks! I wonder if she's here legally?"

Urbanowski said he got involved in the Democratic Party because "doing something is better than sitting on your McManus and doing nothing," referring to state Sen. Michele Bachmann-McManus, whom Republicans may nominate for Secretary of State.

"Democrats have a great slate of candidates running this time, including the populist mayor of Lansing, Virg Bernero, our next Governor; future Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson; future Attorney General David Leyton; our next 3rd District Congressman, Patrick Miles, Jr.; State Senator-to-be David LaGrand; and incumbent Kent County Commissioner Peter Hickey.

"Now if only we could do something about Socialist Kenyan Muslim Barry Husein bin Obomba."