NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

EVERYBODY TAKE COVER! WARN YOUR FRIENDS, NEIGHBORS, AND FAMILIES! CRANK UP THIS VIDEO TO FULL BLAST! THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE IS UNDER ATTACK AND LIBRULZ ARE MAKING OUR NATION SOCIALIST!!!!!

The Kalamazoo City Commission has unanimously passed a nondiscrimination ordinance for sexual orientation:

It will prohibit discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered people when it comes to hiring, housing and other accommodations. The ordinance goes into effect in July.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!! THEY ARE OUT TO GET US AND DESTROY OUR WAY OF LIFE! NOW MY PARENTS' MARRIAGE OF 35 YEARS IS IN JEOPARDY BECAUSE MEMBERS OF THE K'ZOO COMMISSION HAVE DECIDED TO PUSH THE BALL FORWARD ON EQUALITY RATHER THAN DOING THE RIGHT THING AND CHEATING ON THEIR SPOUSES!!!

RUN FOR YOUR WIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!

But that's not all. From The Atlantic:

Have you heard that the United States is headed toward socialism? Jonah Goldberg says it is. Alabama Senator Richard Shelby says it is. Phyllis Schlafly says it is. Richard Viguerie says it is. The Republican National Committee says it is. We must be getting pretty close.

How close? This is what socialism looks like:

0.21%!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! WE'RE BECOMING SOCIALIST THANKS TO B. HUSSEIN OSAMA!!

WILL WE EVER WAKE UP AND LEARN THAT LIBRULZ ARE ATTACKING OUR RIGHT TO HATE OTHERS AND MAKING AMERICA SOCIALIST?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(End sarcasm)